for some odd reason...

I managed to leave the house this morning without my jacket... I think it's because I'm wearing a suit jacket and shirt today. I thought I would try something new... but, yea... I'm still wearing jeans and trainers along with it... I'm fashionable challenged... I know.

It's very damp today, not so much cold but wet wet wet... hey, wasn't that the name of a terrible boy band. God, maybe I should delete the three wets as I'm sure I'm going to end up with some unsuspecting porn searchers at my site, god knows I already get enough hits from pervs looking for pictures of ...

Hazel asked me the most bizarre question on the way to the bus this morning... 'if you could come up with a new name for a colour, what would it be?' I responded ' ickle' it would be a grey/black/brown colour.... 'honey, have you seen my ickle coloured jumper?' I love it already! A while back I came up with this idea with this designer I worked with at Mitel... it was to invent a line of clothing for the discriminating designer... it was a line of t-shirts or tops made to match their exactly CMYK colour reference... geeky indeed... but we talked of having the numbers somewhere small across the chest or on the arm band... of course the silliness spawned into RGB jeans etc... I'm quite thankful that never happened... mind you, now after I've written it, someone is going to stumble upon my site, rip the idea and make millions... well, if you do... please remember the little people. *snivels*

As of late I've been pondering a bunch of things... my grieving is subsiding a bit so it's allowed for a bit more room to move about. I've been wondering, just what sort of catalyst one would require to fully come into their own... I know time is the best way to become one with yourself and such... I've got evidence of this as now in winter I wear a hat and don't care how silly I look, because I'm warm... I want to transfer some of that self assurance into all elements of my life... Some might say I need to embark on a challenge of sorts and push myself to the utter limits of my soul in order to see my true self... I don't think it's that easy. I think I have to rely on time and patience and just absorb things in until there is no more room for uncertainty. How long will that take... will it take as long as it takes that woman in that poem 'when i'm old I'll wear purple'?